ok... so I'm sitting here in my little corner of the HBLL feeling a little bit... ok no a lot bit overwhelmed. I can't even explain it. I just turned down the interview for the job I was almost willing to kill for and I'm wondering if I haven't made a huge mistake. Why is it that I can never follow through? I have this illusion of being something great... but you crack the shell and there's nothing underneath. I really wanted that job.... its like I go into self protection mode and think that somehow it is easier if I turn them down than if they turn me down. In all truth, I could have probably made it through the semester with a job, especially this one since its on campus and probably wouldn't be too hard. When I told the lady I was turning down the interview she looked at me like I was crazy... she was probably thinking something along the lines, "you are the one who applied for the job... whats your problem?" I can't believe I even got Ron Maines(co-founder of the history channel) to be a reference for me... I'm such a dork. And to top it all off, the lady called me on friday... I just went in today to say no. Real professional.....
Hmm so what was Elder Holland's devotional about yesterday? Looking forward and moving on. Easier said than done, I think that's my biggest flaw actually. I have trouble letting go and just getting over things. Too much self reflection....
ok well other than that little slip up, life is going reasonably well. I think...
I'm looking forward to the Russian old new year party on friday, I'm really hoping that will pull me out of this slump.
No comments:
Post a Comment